The Obligatory "What are you doing, why and what are you going to do with it?" post!

"...a person who wears himself out for money or honor or whatever else for someone else's sake, without its being his own passion, his own need, is always a fool."
-Goethe's The Sorrows of Young Werther

From the time I could say the word “doctor,” I knew that I had to become one. My favorite shows as a child were Rescue 911, Trauma Life in the ER, and anything that came on the discovery channel involving copious amounts of blood and guts. Lifesaving appealed to me; I was concerned with making a difference in the world, and I thought, what better way?

I was one of those children that planned their life and stuck to it, doing everything possible to attain my goals. My brain was given to science, or so I thought, and I, therefore, focused everything I did around it. I played with science kits, while my friends played with dolls; I nursed my own cuts and scrapes, while my friends ran to mom or dad, and, as mentioned previously, I watched graphic television shows, while my friends watched cartoons (not to say that I didn’t watch cartoons too, but, you get the point).

There was, however, something else I was given to—stories. Though my parents sometimes confused it with lying, it was clear that I was a story teller from the time I could speak in full sentences. My imagination flourished as a child (and, still!), and I derived immense pleasure from making up stories that entertained people. As I matured and my writing skills developed, this enjoyment of words and stories for sheer entertainment soon developed into my using them to figure out and cope with various situations that arose in my life. When my Grandfather died of lung cancer while I was in the 5^th grade, it secured my desire to become an oncologist that persisted into my first semester of college, but I was only able to cope with it using poetry—reading and writing it.

This conundrum, this battle between my left and right brain, if you will, persisted throughout my school career. In high school, I was that chemistry nerd who stayed after school twice a week to do special experiments to get lab experience; I was also president of my creative writing club. When I wrote these words for my final reflective paper in AP English my Senior year: “I am a politician, a poet, a philosopher, a lobbyist, an eccentric—a writer. I am unique. I am secure. I am myself, comfortable in my words, always,” I should have seen the impending college disaster (the best possible disaster, of course!) coming.

As planned since my early childhood, I came to Transy with my mind set on a Biochemistry major, in hopes of becoming a oncological researcher. But, I decided that I would break up my math and science heavy schedule with a small dose of my other passion—poetry. By the end of the semester, while I was doing great in my chemistry class, I found myself waking up on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, less than excited and trudging to class. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, though, when I had my poetry class, I woke up refreshed, ecstatic, brimming with passion. Immersed in language, I thrived. It was then that I realized the scariest thing I have ever realized—I belong to words, to literature, to English.

(This is the day I declared my English Major. Pointing at my Poetry book, of course! Also the day we rearranged our room, hints the mess.)

Changing my major meant changing my entire self-perception. It meant changing what I had planned for my life from the very beginning of it. It was by far the most troubling but exciting time in my entire life, but the most important thing was that I didn’t face it alone. I had numerous people who were there to encourage and facilitate my self-development, including my poetry professor and my academic advisor, who, through several chats, assured me that change was okay and that I could put my analytical mind to good use in the study of literature too.

(You know you're an English Major when you're this excited about getting books for your birthday!)

I have now picked up a second major (psychology) to appease my sciencey side, but the most important thing I learned from this experience was the value of a liberal arts education. If I had gone to a state school, some huge university, I would have been stuck in the college of science from the very beginning. Transy allowed me to explore my various passions and made the transition from one field of study to a completely different one easier than I could have ever imagined, and I am eternally grateful.

I love what I do now. I wake up every day, regardless of whether or not I had spent 7 hours the previous day reading in the library (such is the life of an English major!), looking forward to every class, looking forward to taking a different route to making a difference in the world. I now hope to pursue research in the field of literature or psychology and become a professor, but, I have learned to keep my life plans loose…so we’ll just have to see what happens!

Oh the Acronyms! KSEC and TERRA

One of the perks of becoming involved with groups on campus is the fact that not only do you get to know your fellow group members, but you also get the opportunity to meet and network with people outside your school who share your same interests and initiatives.

When the Transylvania Environmental Rights and Responsibilities Alliance attended Powershift—the first ever youth summit on climate change—last year in Washington DC, all the schools from Kentucky met up and decided to form a coalition to support and promote environmental initiatives as they pertain to Kentucky. We called the group KSEC—the Kentucky Student Environmental Coalition.

This weekend my fellow TERRA members and I got to witness the beauty of an idea transforming into a tangible reality; we attended the first ever KSEC conference at Western Kentucky University. Though we sacrificed doing our homework for one weekend, we were able to network with likeminded people and collectively organize and plan for the future of our newly formed coalition. 7 schools from across the state were represented at the conference, so we were able to hear the cool environmental awareness events taking place on everyone’s campuses and discuss how we could go about implementing the same sorts of programs at our own school and how that would affect environmental policy in our state.

Speaking of cool environmental awareness events, TERRA just finished its 2 week PowerVote pledge campaign (www.powervote.org), a non-partisan national campaign to get one million students to pledge to keep clean and just energy a priority this election season. TERRA set up a table in Haupt Plaza, one of the most frequented spots on campus and the designated free speech zone, where students and faculty could come to get information on both presidential candidate’s stances and voting records on environmental issues. If the students then agreed that clean and just energy was important to them no matter who they were voting for, they could sign the Power Vote pledge. I saw the staunchest democrats and the most unwavering republicans, libertarians and undecideds all bending over my table scrawling their pledge willingly. It was a beautiful and empowering event, and WE GOT OVER 200 PLEDGES! Now…that doesn’t sound like a lot, but think about it in terms of percentages; at such a small school, that’s nearly 20% of our campus!

The student body’s increasing commitment to the issues I care about and their incredible support of my personal goals makes me prouder to be a Transylvania student every day (if that’s possible, as I was already pretty darn proud.)

And an update on my midterm: I got a B+…sometimes disappointments mysteriously reverse themselves =D.

College Disappointments

Everyone has moments when they face disappointment in themselves and their potential, and alas, that doesn't change in college:

Anyone who knows me will tell you—I’m a studier. My academic performance reigns as my top priority at this point in my life, and so I spend a hefty portion of my days in the library, in my sorority’s chapter room, or in my room behind a book, scrawling notes. As I mentioned before, Transylvania has helped cultivate that work ethic in me. Rarely, though, it seems to backfire.

Today, that happened. I had my midterm in British Literature, definitely one of my favorite classes this semester. I had studied for at least an hour on each of the 3 days prior to the exam and another good 3 hours the night before. I felt as though I had covered all I could, minus going back and rereading each work in full. I felt comfortable with each text and its conceptual implications, but I have always had a problem with on-demand writing.

I can write papers like it’s my job, and consequently that’s what I love to do. Time seems nearly unlimited when it comes to paper writing; I have all the time I feel like spending to figure out how to organize and how to articulate precisely my understanding and ideas regarding whatever topic my paper addresses. Today, when presented with 10 short answer questions and an essay to complete in 50 minutes…I was overwhelmed to say the least. I knew the answers to the questions, what I wanted to talk about, what examples from the texts I would use, but, I had no time to organize my thoughts. My essay ended up loosely organized and vague—a desperate attempt to fit in as much as possible in the limited amount of time. Needless to say, I was not proud. In fact, I felt pretty dejected after class knowing that I could have done better.

It’s hard to rectify the thought of grades as a label of intelligence or overall education. I know that many times that isn’t the case at all. That’s something you have to get used to in college. It’s hard, especially when shooting for graduate school like I am, but I know in the back of my mind that what really matters is the fact that I internalized most of what I had learned, enjoyed it and understood it’s importance and value. Plus, I know this will drive me to work even harder for the final.

For now, though, I think I'll drink a cup of tea and call it a week.

Fall "Break"

“Though these young men unhappily fail to understand that the sacrifice of life is, in many cases, the easiest of all sacrifices, and that to sacrifice, for instance, five or six years of their seething youth to hard and tedious study, if only to multiply tenfold their powers of serving the truth and the cause they set before them as their goal—such a sacrifice is utterly beyond the strength of many of them.”

-Fyodor Dostoevsky: The Brothers Karamazov

Today, I got some grief from some of my friends at UK about our Fall Break here at Transy, and while I have been taking it easier on myself than usual the past few days, I can tell you, this hasn’t been too much of a “break.” If there’s one thing you have to get used to at Transy, it’s having work on weekends, on breaks, and, well, always. Sound scary? Don’t worry. I came from a high school where I didn’t have to work, and I mean really work, for a whole lot. I could get away with not reading; I could start my papers the night before they were due, and I didn’t need to study much in order to do well. That changed the first day of class here at Transy. The professors have exceedingly high standards for our academic performance, but I feel like “that has made all the difference,” to quote Frost.

Because these professors have pushed me to what felt like my utter limits, I have learned not only to cope with a demanding schedule, but also to take pride in my academic achievements. No longer do I see school as something that comes easy, something just to get through. I now look forward to every class, to learning even more about fascinating subjects from professors whose passion for their subjects is unparalleled. Every grade is a personal challenge that I can be proud of when I meet my own academic standards. I no longer get inundated and burned out with the busy work that often haunts high school students. Instead, everything I have learned here, every class I have taken, has been incomparably valuable. It has significantly expanded the knowledge with which I can approach problems across the academic spectrum and in the “real world;” I knew the beauty of a Liberal Arts education when I brought up a concept from my Psychology class to explain something in my History class last semester.

I guess this is just to say that, as I lay here on the Monday of Fall Break with my British Literature spread before me dauntingly, I couldn’t imagine myself anywhere else, even somewhere where I had an actual break. I know that not only will I probably enjoy this late 15^th century drama, Everyman (literature nerd, I know), but also I will most likely be able to use the knowledge I gain from it outside the realm of English, and even academia as a whole—and Transy is the reason I can do that.

Summer was a long enough break, anyhow. =)

I'm a TERRA Trooper!

Along with educating yourself, finding your passion, and learning to operate a washing machine, college is about learning how to become a better citizen of the community and of the world. During my first year at Transy I quickly discovered that I had more outlets for my development as a global citizen than I could possibly imagine! One stood out, though, that combined my passion for nature and environmental justice with a fun way to become active in finding solutions to campus, community and global issues—The Transylvania Environmental Rights and Responsibilities Alliance.

Whether it’s taking a trip to Washington D.C. to lobby for climate change legislation, hosting interactive environmental awareness events in Haupt Plaza, attending neighborhood cleanups, or making sustainable crafts, TERRA offers everyone a way to get involved. Since becoming the Head Representative of TERRA, I have witnessed the virility of the green initiative on our campus. At Transy’s annual involvement fair a few weeks ago, we had nearly 80 new members sign up for our mailing list! This proves that Transy students care about environmental issues, and truly think globally.

From “trash to treasures,” a sustainable craft series, to RecycleMania, from a Green Jobs Initiative to decorating a rain barrel for charity, I can’t wait to see what other exciting things our new members think up for this year, but one thing is for certain: Crimson is going green, and we’re never turning back!

Sustainability is one of those things that are constantly at the forefront of my mind, and I will, therefore, probably talk about it a lot in my blog. I hope to cover the various events held on campus to promote green issues, and I hope you’re just as excited as I am!

Reflections on Going Greek

Last Monday, I received 31 new sisters into my sorority—Phi Mu. While I screamed and cheered with excitement as our new members ran toward us, I also laughed thinking back to a little over a year ago when I was doing the running.

Let’s just say, I am NO sorority girl, and all signs pointed away from my donning Greek letters that day a year ago. I have always held myself to the ideals of self motivation, independence, and individuality, and, coming into college, Greek life seemed like the bane of all those traits. During the first few weeks on campus, however, I noticed something interesting—the strongest, most outspoken, independent female leaders on campus that I met all wore Greek letters. I then decided to give this whole Greek thing a shot.

I went through recruitment, and met amazing women--women who shared my ideals, whose actions were driven by a self-motivation to achieve greater goals not just for themselves, but for the betterment of the campus, the community and the world. Cheesy? Maybe. But, Greek life is honestly different here. It is constructive. It is academically focused, emphasizing leadership and service over partying and running around in togas, bunny costumes and what have you (though, we do have fun, don’t get me wrong).

When I ran to my sorority, like these girls were doing on Monday, I knew these women would not only encourage my free-spiritedness, but also enable it. I cannot count the number of times in the past year when these women, sometimes the most unlikely of them, have helped me achieve my individual goals, regardless of whether or not they personally agreed with them. I haven’t lost a shred of my individuality or independence. Instead, I am able to express those traits more openly with a solid support group, who not only accepts my peculiar quirks, assertive opinions, and hefty goals, but also encourages them, because all those things are so inherently Amanda.

Intro and a little Dali

Hello, friends! In my first post, I thought I would spend a few minutes describing a little more about who I am and how I ended up at a place like Transylvania University, and also why I have chosen this specific title for my blog. If you couldn’t tell, I hate about me sections and therefore find it hard to condense my history, my personality, and my values into a few sentences. That being said, let’s jump in, shall we?

I’m Amanda, as you probably have figured out at this point. I am from Versailles, KY, a small town just a spit away from Lexington and Transy. Seriously. I get aggravated when it takes me 20 minutes to get home. While this wouldn’t be so monumentally relevant under normal circumstances, I was one of those kids in high school. You know those kids--the ones who want to go to college as far away from home as possible in order to experience complete change. At the beginning of my college search, which started way before it probably should have, before I knew myself well enough to make such an important decision, my heart was set on UCLA, Johns Hopkins, anywhere out of the state of Kentucky. Quite obviously, something drastic must have changed for me to finally settle on Transy, right? Wrong. Actually, the simplest thing sold me on Transy—visiting here.

My parents dragged me kicking and screaming here for the fall open house in 2006. Okay, so I didn’t really kick and scream, but I didn’t want to come; that’s a fact. As soon as I arrived, however, one simple thing after another began to change my mind. The students opened doors for me. They smiled at me and said “hello” even when I had taken my name tag off. They cared about a well rounded education, leadership and service. The professors were enthusiastic and eager to talk to me about my academic as well as life goals—and this was just my first visit! Needless to say, I didn’t even fill out my applications to any of my out of state dream schools, because, it turned out my real dream school had been hiding in my backyard all along. In addition, it turns out that I didn’t have to go so far away from home to experience that complete change I had always craved, but more on that in a future post.

I have since completed my first year at Transy, and I have chosen to title my blog “One Second Before Awakening” to reflect how I view my college experience thus far. I have essentially snatched a piece of the title from Salvador Dali’s painting, “One Second Before Awakening from a Dream Caused by the Flight of a Bee Around a Pomegranate.” If you haven’t heard of it, take a look! http://www.virtualdali.com/44DreamCaused.html . I know what you must be thinking. How can THAT painting relate at all, even slightly, to the college experience? And I say this to you: in college, one is suspended between childhood and the “real world,” just as in a dream one is suspended between consciousness and unconsciousness. What we dream often can have profound impacts on the way we view and process the situations that arise in our conscious lives, and while I have yet to see any pomegranates eating fish eating tigers at Transy, as appears in the painting, I know that everything that has happened, is happening and will happen here will directly affect all of my decisions and values when I awaken into the “real world.”

So far, this has been and continues to be a fabulous, even sometimes fantastical journey, and I can’t wait to share that with you!